#mish talks books

[jeanmoreaux]

Hi, this is a bit random, but I was thinking of reading Deathless by Cathrynne Valente and saw on your goodreads that you enjoyed, so I wanted to ask whether you would recommend it. I love dark and twisted fairytales with lush writing (which is why I think I would enjoy it), but I'm afraid it will be another simple story that romanticises a toxic romance between a plain girl and a villain - what is your consensus? (hope I'm not bothering you, wishing you a lovely day<3)

you're not bothering me at all! i am here to talk about books, i am so glad you're asking! oh i absolutely recommend it if my goodreads review sounds like something you could vibe with. i wouldn't say the characters or even their dynamics are the focus of the narrative. in the strictest sense it's a book very concerned with genre and conventions and the tradition of storytelling (at least how i read it). it's not romanticising anything as much as it explores the idea of toxic relationships/stories as a cultural tool/cyclic nature of things within the archetypes it plays with. because the characters aren't really characters, they are definitely better thought of as archetypes that serve a meta-narrative purpose in the story. you COULD read the relationship aspect as enemies-to-enemies-that-are-also-lovers, but i think it does the story a disservice to reduce it to that because that isn't what the book is interested in exploring (not really. there is so much more going on in the (sub)text). idk it's heard to explain, i think you really have to give it a chance and find out in what way the story wants to be read by you and if that reading works for you. it's not comparable to much else i have read, but if you think of a combination of the bloody chamber and other stories by angela carter, the night circus by erin morgenstern, the winternight trilogy by katherine arden, and leave some room for something uniquely 'deathless' you might have a vague idea of what the book is like.

[theskeletonatthewritersblock]

When Catha nearly dies after an attempt on their life, they wake to the loss of sight in their left eye, and the ability to see into the oceans of Tathos, of the Seraphina galaxy, which is contained in a reality separate from their own.

Vicen falls at the hands of a rival Sea Master, but when he rises it is with sights on a city known as Palmoa, located on a world not light years away, but time lines.

Together Catha and Vicen, bound by a tether stronger then the laws of reality, must aid in their separate struggles to seek revenge on their killers, and stop a gate from opening that may see the ultimate destruction of both of their worlds.

[chlochette-sunde]

Know your Destiel/Cockles history: a calendar 

As a newcomer on Tumblr and on the Supernatural fandom, I first had trouble following all the past events that were regularly reminded and celebrated.

On this very special day (December 14th, European time), the following post is an attempt at listing those events, focusing on Destiel and Cockles (with a hint of Jenmisheel). Feel free to advise me for more (or less) dates!

Acknowledgement: The idea came from @youchangedmedestiel who also contributed to the content. The present post would never have been possible without @livebloggingmydescentintomadness 's Cockles masterlist. Color code: Destiel / Cockles

Honorary periodic event: FIMMF (Finger In My Mouth Friday)

January

12th: "Mish. Dee." (2021) - 1

16th: Broadcast of 15x09 “The Trap” (2020) - /

17th: ‘Isn't the season you met Misha?’ ‘Taste the rainbow’ JaxCon (2016) - 1

18th: The abandoned Jenmisheel podcast (2022) - 1

24th: Dean's birthday + ‘Jensen's the horse’ HousCon (2015) - / + 1

February

2nd: Broadcast of 12x10 “Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets” (2017) - /

14th: Destiel wedding anniversary (2021)

16th: Broadcast of 12x12 “Stuck in the Middle (With You)” (2017) - /

26th: ‘Which is funny, because so do I’ JIB11 (2023) - 1

28th: ‘Misha's been working out’ ‘He has though, hasn't he?’ NashCon (2016) - 1

March

1st: Jensen Ackles' birthday (1978) - 1 2 3 4

18th: Danneel Ackles' birthday (1979)

20th: Broadcast of 8x17 “Goodbye Stranger” + Gag reel (2013) - / + 1

23rd: Broadcast of 7x17 “The Born-Again Identity” (2012) + Broadcast of 15x13 “Destiny’s Child” + Gag reel (Jensen's infamous fart joke) (2020) - / + 1

April

1st: Mishapocalypse (2013) + Mishapocalypse 2.0 (2023) - 1 2 + 3

10th: “When Harry Met Sally” JIB2 (2011) - 1

13th: Season 15 EW Photoshoot (2020) - 1 2

15th: Broadcast of 5x18 “Point of No Return” + Gag reel (blowjob+‘we’re missing the gay angel’+‘confetti it’s a parade’) (2010) - 1 + 2 3 4 

15th: Bishagate 2.0 NJCon (2023) + Misha’s Cas essay (2022) - 1 2 + 3

23th: Bishagate ‘I’m all three’ NJCon (2022) - 1

25th: ‘I happen to be straight’ (2022) - 1 2

27th: Broadcast of 12x19 “The Future” (2017) - 1 2 3 4

28th: ‘Balls deep’ CR8 (2024) - 1

29th: Broadcast of 6x19 “Mommy Dearest” + Gag reel (2011) - 1

May

6th: Broadcast of 6x20 “The Man Who Would Be King” (2011) - /

7th: First release of 'Watching Over Me' (2021) - 1

19th: Straddlegate JIB10 (2019) - 1 2 3 4

21st: Jensen's bear underwear reveal JIB8 (2017) - 1

23rd: ‘Okay babe’ (2021) - 1

24th: Misha tenderly rescuing Jensen+’We like you the best’+Hitch scene JIB5 (2014) - 1 2 3

26th: ‘It’s not a subtext. It was clear text.’ PurCon8 (2024) - 1

27th: ‘I talked to Jensen and Danneel this morning because I couldn’t sleep’ PurCon7 (2023) - 1

June

July

1st: ‘I miss my blanky’ + ‘I love you’ VS ‘I need you’ (2021 (yes, on the same fucking day)) + ‘Also, Cas is gay.’ (2023) - 1 2 3 + 4

14th: 'Destiel is Cockles Fault' Day SFCon (2024) - 1

24th: ‘Wow, that was really informative. Thank you.’ SDCC (2011) + ‘How do you know’ SDCC (2016) - 1 + 2

August

9th: Destiel fanfics first ship to reach the milestone of 100,000 stories 'I have to admit, I like being on top' (2021)

13th: ‘I’d love to do a Western…slash romcom with Misha’ VanCon (2017) - 1

17th: Cockles day at sea (2015) + ‘I would probably choose to be the car, because Dean would ride me all day’ SPNDEN (2018) - 1 2 + 3

18th: Destiel winning TV Choice Best Chemistry (2015) - 1

20th: Misha Collins' birthday (1974) - 1

September

8th: Release of "Some things I Still Can't Tell You", poetry book by Misha Collins - Men in the Woods (2021) - 1

13th: First broadcast of Supernatural (2005) - /

18th: Broadcast of Lazarus Rising, first appearance of Castiel (2008) + First release of Jensen publicly singing 'Angeles' (2012) (+Bonus: Jensen serenading Misha at JIB11 (2023)) - 1 + 2 3 4

24th: Broadcast of 5x03 “Free to Be You and Me” (2009) (Bonus: reference of ‘personal space’ at SFCon (2024)) - 1

October

11th: Danneel Ackles, sharing a picture of Jensen, reading "Some things I still can't tell you" by the fire, Misha tagged on his heart (2021) - 1 2 

13th: Broadcast of 12x01 “Keep Calm and Carry On” + ‘You're poking me’ Gag reel (2016) - 1

16th: ‘He’s like an angel plushie’ DenCon (2021) - 1

20th: ‘I can say whatever I want because Danneel is in love with you' HCCB (2024) - 1 

21st: Broadcast of 10x03 “Soul Survivor” + ‘Aloha cowboy’ Gag reel (2014) - 1 2

23rd: ‘I should have said ‘I love you too’ and hugged him’ VanCon (2022) - 1

28th: Broadcast of 11x04 “Baby” (2015) (Bonus: reenactment of the CasDean scene at JIB7 (2016))

November

5th: Broadcast of 15x18 "Despair" - Destiel's anniversary (2020) - /

8th: ‘Homosexual declaration of love’ Darklight Online Con (2020) + 'I live it' (2021) - 1 (no official proof because the panel has mysteriously been deleted from social medias around the 26th) + 2

11th: Broadcast of 10x05 “Fan Fiction” (2014) - /

12th: Broadcast of 9x06 “Heaven Can't Wait” (2013) - /

16th: Broadcast of 13x06 “Tombstone” (2017) + ‘Release the tapes!’ Day (2020) - / + 1

19th: Broadcast of 15x20 "Carry on" -> Last episode of Supernatural (so far 🕯🤞🏻) (2020) + Misha sharing by mistake (?) “The epic love story of Jensen Ackles and Misha Collins” blog (2013) - / + 1 2

24-25th: 'y yo a ti' (2020) - 1 

24th: ‘His ferret goes other places’ (2024) - 1

26th: Misha having to live stream and do PR during Thanksgiving, in mid divorce, following 'y yo a ti' (2020) - 1

December

1st: Danneel sharing a post to promote "The Adventurous Eaters Club", featuring Jensen and their kids (2019) - 1 2

5th: ‘I love you, not like a brother, but like a lover’ CCXP (2024) - 1 2

6th: ‘Cas was supposed to have his arm around Dean in the bar’ CCXP (2024) - 1 2

14th: Cockles anniversary (2009) + Introduction of 'Eyes Like The Sky' beer (2020) - 1 2 3 + 4

19th: Jenmisheel holiday package (2017) - 1 2

[ninyard]

Do you have any HCs for Kayleigh?? I always wonder about the pre-AFTG series story (and the big players).

There’s brief stuff in the EC abt Tetsuji & Kayleigh. but other than that it’s pretty blank?

Also the detail abt exy becoming popular partially via a manga ? I want the missing chapter when Tetsuji reacts to that 😭😭

Oh Kayleigh and Tetsuji!!!!!!!! I picture her so clearly in University in Dublin in her final year of Sports Management or whatever course she did, writing her thesis on mixed gender sports or the invention of new sports and sitting down with her thesis lecturer with this idea. Kayleigh finding a mentor in this man, or woman, and saying to them I want to do something bold, something amazing. She's on the Lacrosse team in UCD. She plays on as many of the teams that she can without jeopardising her studies.

Kayleigh moving to Japan for her masters, and meeting Tetsuji, and she sees herself in him, this glint in his eyes that says he needs to be destined for more. Them sitting across from each other in the library with books about sports and the invention of different things and Tetsuji looks at a sport like Lacrosse and says it's missing something. I think it could be better. And they spitball these ideas back and forth. Should it be on ice, bigger teams, smaller teams? Should it be outdoors or indoors? Is it violence? Is it violence that it's missing?

Kayleigh talking to her mom, sending letters to Ireland, making expensive phone calls in the middle of the night all the way across the world, begging her to send her VHS tapes of as many hurling games as she could find - her mother complaining about how expensive they'd be to ship to Japan, but she agrees anyway. Kayleigh finding as many books as she can about Irish sport and the history of it all. It's a couple of weeks before she get the package at her door, and she calls Tetsuji when he's in the middle of a lecture and tells him to come over. There in front of her is four, five, six tapes of All Ireland final matches, and they sit down in front of the TV with their notebooks in front of them.

They don't write anything after the first match, Tetsuji staring at the screen like he's taking it all in, Kayleigh staring at him with a smile on her face like this is what he was waiting to see. 70 minutes go by and she switches the tape out for another one, and then another, and another, and they stay up until the sun rises just taking notes and watching. Brainstorming. Kayleigh explains the rules to him. They draw pictures, and there's a million failed ideas that don't work, like a flat racquet more similar to a hurley than a lacrosse stick, or helmets more similar to a cricket helmet than an american football one. No armor, more armor, too much armor.

Them finding each other after class, and proposing this idea for their dissertation, their master's thesis, their final project, and getting a ridiculous look. Getting shut down, getting told it's ridiculous. So they do what they were supposed to do; make it fucking happen anyway.

They spend all the savings that they have, and Tetsuji contacts his family, and they get things shipped over to Japan - hurling helmets, hockey gear, lacrosse sticks. All these mish-mash element that creates the idea thats been living inside their heads. They have 10 different types of balls, a tennis ball, a cricket ball, a baseball, all these different options, and the two of them find out the schedule of all the pitches and fields and courts on campus and try it everywhere. It's messy, but it's exciting, and invigorating. They have their bulging notebooks on the ground, and every rule and idea they have, every thing that feels right or wrong, they write it down. They're taping weights around the lacrosse sticks to see if it feels better, padding out their gear with cardboard and duct tape. There's something missing, still. They try it on ice, and its too unbalanced and sloppy, but the first time Tetsuji shoots a ball at the plexiglass wall, and it rebounds right into Kayleigh's net, they both look at each other like that's it. That's what we've been missing. They jump on top of each other and get scolded for falling on the ice and screaming in the rink.

They figure out how much it would cost for them to rent out the unused college soccer pitch for the summer, and find ten of their friends and classmates and explain the rules as best they can. It's expensive, buying the gear for them all, figuring out how to surround the soccer pitch in plexiglass that's strong enough to not topple over from the weight of a person. They spend that summer finessing the rules, and finessing the positions, and teaching their friends how to play. By September, Tetsuji invites his family to watch, and Kayleigh invites their lecturers to watch, and there they stand. The first ever game of Exy.

It's not perfect - a goal falls over, the floor of the pitch isn't quite working, because they keep stumbling over their own feet when they run, but it's a brilliant thing to watch; something new, and unique, and never been done before. Kayleigh's team beats Tetsuji's team, and for a while they don't hear much. But their friends keep playing, they keep contacting people, making phonecalls to manufacturers and sports clubs.

I'm just thinking about those first few years where Kayleigh and Tetsuji probably spent every waking moment together just figuring it out. Their dorm rooms or apartments full of crap, different balls and equipment. Her bedroom wall covered in drawing and scraps of paper and ideas. Them spending most of their time on the phone with each other when they're not together in person. Thinking about them creating presentations and pitches and just trying to get their silly little idea of the ground, waiting for someone to take a chance on them, waiting for all the different sports committees and companies to call them back. A million "Sorry, no thank you!" emails and a million "It's just not something we can help you with" letters and phone calls. Until they get that one, then those two, those three words that say fucking go for it. The four words that say I believe in this.

I think about Kayleigh and Tetsuji running off of redbull and adrenaline, and how happy they would've felt when that first game finished and they saw something in each others eyes. Before their passion got killed by the reality, by the Moriyama's, by the world pushing them back again and again and again. But more of their classmates get involved. Somebody asked "What is it that you kids have built on the soccer field?" and then it's in a local paper. It's letters sent back to Ireland signed off in Japanese saying I can't wait to tell you what I've been working on.

Yeah. Yeah I have a lot of thoughts about Kayleigh. I have some images of her and Tetsuji in my head. Just a few!

[danjaley]

Alternative Ending to 1793

(Lots of alternative plotlines in this year!)

So the gist of the plotline always was that Matt and Jon return, on the whole successful, but nothing really is as it was before. Jon is heartbroken about Nicolas and went to exile in Cornwall to avoid him. Matt learns about his children's illnesses and Alasdair's plans to visit his mother. Originally there was to be a complete hysteric letter from herself, but it never progressed past those two sentences. I still think Ysobel's reaction is very much in character, but when I wrote this, I thought it was the first letter the Duchess sent in those nine years.

The Duchess’s letter: Do not deny me the comfort to see my son once more! It is the most cruel thing a mother can suffer to be separated from her child! Ysobel: I don’t want to argue to the contrary, but she doesn’t seem to have felt the cruelty very keenly these past nine years.

Then, Jon fell ill in Cornwall and had to be rescued by Matt. In this version it's much more apparent why Matt feels he needs to rush to his aid, and also it's not Christmas yet. Emotionally, I rather liked this version. But what I finally went with brought out better that Matt just can't get down from his stress-level and sense of responsibility. Although he is overreacting in assuming Jon was dying.

Matthew: Shon hashn’’ shen’ a le’’er thish ‘eek. Ah’m shailing ‘o Cor’’all. Alice: Are you sure it’s not just the post being delayed? Matthew: Ah shaid Ah’d come if he shtopped wri’ing. Sho Ah’ll go. Ah can’’ jusht leave Shon ‘o die! No’ af’er Ah kille’ a ma’ for him. Alice: Nobody said he was dying! Wait, you did what!? […]

(Jonathan Brodie to Matthew McCarric, letter delayed in the post) I have a bad cold. Only writing to prevent you from rushing to Cornwall.

Jonathan: Matt! What are you doing here? I wrote to you! Matthew: Musht ha’e mished me. Are y’ ill? Why ish it sho col’ here? Jonathan: To fetch more wood I’d have to get out of bed. And the landlady’s servants are busy elsewhere. Matthew (shouting down staircase): Ah wan’ ‘o shee a fire in the Shottish Shentleman’sh room thish inshtan’! An’ bring shome hot shoup! * * * Matthew: Are y’ be’’er? Jonathan: Yes. Thank you. I’m glad you’re here.

Another reason I changed plans was that I felt a professional failure would be a bit too much misfortune for poor Jon. Actually, the next scene in which we'll see him at work in 1794 makes much more sense if he was successful in Cornwall.

Matthew: Wha’ are we goin’ ‘o do wi’ you? Jonathan: I don’t know any more. I’d really like to go home. Then I could at least read my books and have Sarah look after me. But my apartment is only a few streets away from my parents’ house. Mother would want me to visit. It would only be painful. And dangerous. Matthew: Have you finishe’ your work for ‘he Cornish Shentleman? Jonathan: No. I fell ill. He chose another architect’s plans.

And then there was all this fuss getting him back to Edinburgh where we need him. That's why I finally decided to cut it short, let him return straight away, and jump to the Christmas scenes.

Jonathan: The only idea I had at all was to sell my apartment and buy another somewhere else. Glasgow might work. It’s not too far away and closer to you. I’m certainly cured of the English south. But then – as someone who knows a thing or two about real estate – it would be such a bad deal to trade in Edinburgh for Glasgow just because of a broken heart. Matthew: Jusht co’e home wi’ me. You ca’ shtay i’ the guesht room you deshigned yourshelf. Jonathan: Thank you. But I can’t intrude upon you and Alice when your baby is so ill. But we can travel together and I take a room in Glasgow. At least until Christmas. Mother will invite everyone then and I can’t stay away without giving very good reasons. Matt – you’ll come to all the Christmas gatherings too, won’t you? Then I could at least talk to you the entire time. Matthew: Ah can’’ shtay away fro’ ‘hem either.

Regrettably though, this eliminated the concluding gag for Captain Burton's storyline:

Captain Burton: Good morning! Is Mr McCarric in? Eliza: I’m afraid not. He’s down South to help a relative in need. Captain Burton: Are you kidding me!?

Secret fun fact: I'm really glad it's 1794 now! I'm still not sure if it's a very elaborate joke between us or if we're actually going to do this. But my sister and I started researching for a historical novel to write together, which would be set in 1794 (got to do with the French Revolution, but not with Scotland). I've been confusing the two years all this summer!

[yourmomsgranddad]

— PAPER RINGS

— PAIRING: Kate Bishop x Jones!fem!reader

— SUMMARY: MJ knows Kate likes you so she tries her hardest to get you two together.

— WORD COUNT: 4.3k (dang)

— WARNINGS: i think there's a curse word but too lazy to find it, i know there aren't lockers in college but let me be

"Kate, stop!"

She was pulled out of her daze that she was stuck in, and she realized where she was. In the cafeteria with her friends. She still had her backpack and she forgot to take it off.

"Stop what?" She wondered, finally looking at Peter. He looked annoyed with her, like what did she do. "Staring at Y/n. It's getting creepy, dude."

This was a common occurrence, Kate and her friends would sit down and immediately her eyes would shoot to where you were.

It was getting creepy, Peter was right.

"If she wants to stare, let her. She doesn't say anything when you do." MJ called behind Peter, her nose was in her book like usual and it was like she wasn't even there.

"Yeah. MJ's right. I never say anything when you ogle Gwen."

"I DON'T OGLE HER!" He was very quick to defend himself and got very loud. He looked around to see if anyone else was looking at him, and surely enough, no one cared.

"Sure you don't! I bet you know what she's wearing today." Kate tested. She smirked as he fell into his seat, she knew her friend way too well and he knew it.

"I hate you sometimes."

She stuck her tongue out at him teasingly, causing him do the same. "You two are such children." MJ weighed in once more before picking up her stuff and leaving the table. They both watched as she walked across the cafeteria and sat right next to you.

Kate's eyes never left as she watched you get excited talking to MJ and giving her a hug.

It never stopped crossing Kate's mind that you were MJ's sister. In the middle of lunch, at the same time everyday, MJ would take her stuff and go sit with you, her sister. She wanted so badly to ask MJ if she could go with her but something in her was just stopping her from saying it.

So she stayed silent every time she walked away, completely filled with regret.

Kate looked at the clock and suddenly an hour had passed. She didn't even realize she was in the library that long. She was about to get another tardy. Crap.

She shoved all of her stuff into her backpack and just started running.

She was not looking where she was going, she didn't care who she was bumping into, she needed to get to class and these people were just blips in an already bad day.

She thought she was going to speeds unknown to man. She thought she was basically the Flash. She thought she was going to make it to class on time. But of course, something had to get in her way, in the form of a piece of metal.

She went flying into someone's locker, making her fall down.

"Dude, you were going top speeds! Are you okay?" The mystery person wondered as Kate started rubbing the bump that was beginning on her head.

The person who slammed their locker into her, got down to her level and started rubbing her head for her. "I'm sorry. I didn't see you." She began shaking her head, muttering some 'it's fine's' before her eyesight came back to normal and she saw who she bumped into (and who was touching her head).

It was you.

"I think you should go to the nurse, Kate. You collided in that locker a little hard." You sucked in some air as you grimaced at the bruise on her forehead. "How-how do you know my name?" Her words came out a little dazed as she was starting to feel the weird of her injury.

"You're Mish's friend. I know all of her friends."

"Mish?"

You didn't hear her confusion as you helped her off the floor and started guiding her down the hallway, away from her class. "Wait. What about my class?" She began reaching back, almost trying to push herself in the other direction.

"Kate, you're bleeding. I think class can wait."

So she stopped pushing, just walking alongside you, not knowing what to say. This was basically the first time she was talking to you and she was bleeding. Today was going great.

She hadn't even realized how close she was to you right now. She could finally identify the scent that would come from you. Everyday she would wonder what you smell like but she only ever got a small whiff since you were always walking past her but she finally got it.

"What perfume is that?"

"Oh. Some fancy one my mom got me for Christmas. I don't know why I keep wearing it. It makes me smell like a bougie bitch." You griped, rolling your eyes at your own decisions.

"Really? I think you smell wonderful."

Your expression softened at the sound of her compliment. You never heard someone compliment your scent before. In fact, that bougie bitch comment came from MJ when you got it.

"Thank you."

You gave a little look, expressing your gratitude. She returned your gaze and almost didn't want to look away. She never seen your eyes up close and she kind of wanted to cherish it, just in case, this was a dream she was about to wake up from.

Sadly, your staring contest was shortened as you finally made it to the campus nurse. You opened the door with your free hand and helped her sit down on the little couch they kept in the waiting area.

Luckily, there was no one in there today. So they could get to Kate immediately.

"What's going on with her?" The nurse asked you as you went to take Kate's temperature. "I hit her in the face with my locker." You mentioned, almost slumping to make yourself look smaller.

"Why do you kids keep doing this? At some point, you would just stop swinging your lockers open." The nurse seemed to be at her last straw, a lot of other kids probably came in for the same thing.

"Kate, I'll get you some ice and you can lay down if your head is bothering you. I'll give you both late slips." You nodded and the nurse left you there with Kate for a few minutes.

"Sorry about the bruise."

"It's fine. I tripped over Peter's skateboard once."

"He skates?"

"No."

That caused a chuckle to fall from your mouth and suddenly, Kate was in a trance. It was the loveliest sound she had ever heard. She absolutely fell in love with it.

Maybe it was the blood rushing to her head but it seemed like you were moving in slow motion.

But surely enough, time was moving normally and the nurse had come back. She gave you your late slip and it was time for you to go. You waved bye to Kate and disappeared. All in slow motion.

She needed to lay down.

The bell indicating that next period was starting rang as loud as possible, waking Kate up from her daze. She didn't even notice she was sleeping until she heard it.

The nurse popped up in the doorway, causing Kate to jump and almost hit her head again. "Do you have a class you need to be in?"

Kate looked up in thought, there happened to be a picture of her schedule right in the front of her brain. It was Thursday and she was in her sixth period...where was she supposed to be?

"No! I have a free period."

The nurse nodded. "Well if you're feeling better, you can leave." Now it was Kate's turn to nod. Things were awkwardly silent as she grabbed her backpack and shuffled out of the nurse's office as quick as she could.

She face-planted onto her bed, completely disregarding any type of assignment her teachers gave her. It didn't matter right now. She was tired and her head was hurting.

She was almost asleep. Until she heard her phone beep from her pocket. She threw her hand back, just reaching around it like she didn't know where it was. And surely enough, it was from her group chat

emjay 📖: katherine!

kate 🏹: yes mj? is there something you need at this moment?

pete 🕸: we just wanted to know where you were during fifth period. you weren't in science class.

kate 🏹: yeah, because i was in the nurse's office.

emjay 📖: who'd you hurt?

kate 🏹: i was the one that was hurt. i haven't sent that many people to the nurse's office!

pete 🕸: tell that to poor ted! you send him to the nurse's office every other week.

emjay 📖: poor ted, man.

kate 🏹: what? do you guys have a crush on ted or something?

emjay 📖: no!

pete 🕸: a little.

emjay 📖: pin that conversation for later. why were you in the nurse's office?

kate 🏹: your sister hit me with her locker.

pete 🕸: okay! wattpad! did you get her number or did she get kidnapped afterward? did you guys make out or something? spill it!

emjay 📖: why are you such a woman?

pete 🕸: rude.

As she watched her friends bicker back and forth, she noticed an unknown number texted her.

??: hey.

She was a little wary at first, she didn't have a good track record with unknown numbers. They almost always tried to steal her money. She hoped that not what this was.

kate: hello? who is this?

??: oh sorry. that probably seemed a little ominous. it's me, y/n.

Kate froze. Not only was this the first time you spoke in person and touched, but now you were texting her. She was exploding, metaphorically and physically.

kate: oh! how did you get your number?

you: from mj. she gave it to me earlier today. said to text you or call if i ever needed to. i thought it was weird until i gave you head trauma earlier. 😬

She switched tabs real quick, going back to the group chat.

kate 🏹: michelle jones-watson!

pete 🕸: full name alert!

emjay 📖: don't call me watson. what?

kate 🏹: did you give your sister my number?!

emjay 📖: yes i did.

kate 🏹: WHY?!

pete 🕸: for love obviously. mj might not show it but she loves love.

emjay 📖: you start that, i'll break all your bones.

She decided to leave her friends to their bickering and go back to the previous conversation.

you: i didn't text to apologize if that's what you're thinking.

kate: oh? then what for?

you: to make sure you don't tell anybody about this. i'm already on the run from the law and i don't need this on my record.

kate: what about the nurse that helped me?

you: what nurse? 🤫

Kate's stomach settled as the two of you landed in a comfortable banter. Talking to you was more calming than she thought. Talking to you was easy, it was almost like the two of you were friends.

But then Kate noticed the time, you had been talking for a while.

kate: wow, look at the time. guess we should get some rest.

you: you're right. i'll see you later.

kate: night.

you: goodnight, kate ❤️

It was just an emoji. It was just pixels coming from a screen. Then why did her heart jump when she saw it? Why was there a tint forming on her cheeks? Wow, she was whipped and it was frightening.

She was going to bed.

Going into classes the next morning, she needed to tell someone about what happened the night before. She scanned the grounds for one of her friends. She spotted Peter, sitting on a bench, giggling with some guy.

She ran over to him, falling over into his lap. She didn't mean to fall onto him but she didn't care since he didn't.

The guy was long gone and they were just left alone.

"Katie? What's wrong?"

"I was texting with Y/n all night."

Things went silent between them. She looked up to find Peter's eyes opened wide in shock. He wasn't expecting her to say as much as she didn't expect it to happen.

"Why? How? When? Well I know when. But how?"

"Not only that. But when we were saying goodnight, she sent me a red heart." If it was possible, his eyes were even wider. "Dude." That was all he said, letting her know what he was thinking. And her only response was a nod, they both understood what it meant.

"How are you getting more action than me?"

"Oh how are things going with your Gwen quest anyway?"

Suddenly, he fell over and now he was in Kate's lap instead of the other way around. Now she was the one consoling him.

"Every time I try to talk to her, my throat closes up and my hands get sweaty. It's honestly getting annoying." He griped, burying his head in her lap further.

"What's getting annoying?"

They looked beside them, noticing MJ, who just happened to appear in the seat next to Kate. Holding her book, like she was already there.

"Peter's mad because he's weird and can't talk to women, especially Gwen." She let her know, as she continued rubbing Peter's back soothingly.

"You need to stop being weird. I know Gwen. Just be yourself and you should be fine." She wasn't even looking at him as she gave him this advice.

But he nodded, intaking it. Only time would tell if he could do it.

Things were comfortably silent as they just sat there, just enjoying the wind.

"Hi!"

You appeared out of nowhere, almost like MJ did, in front of Kate, causing her to fall over, behind the bench. "Oh shit."

You shuffled toward her, reaching down to help her up. "I feel like at this point, I'm a danger to you." You joked, laughing it off to make yourself feel less bad.

"No. If anything, I'm a danger to myself. You're just a bystander." Leave it up to Kate to make her head trauma about someone else.

Kate looked down, noticing your hands still intertwined. Just looking, you guys were drastically different.

Kate's hands had a few scratches here and there from when she gets so angry she uses her punching bag in the night. Her fingers were just riddled with rings, one on each finger. Her black nail polish was chipped and she didn't ever feel like fixing it.

Your were perfectly clean, your nails were constantly polished, not a chip in sight. You had rings on every other finger.

"Our hands look nice together." You muttered, looking down at your hands with a dreamy look in your eyes.

Kate froze. It's not that she didn't think your hands looked nice together, it's just that she was nervous. So she snatched her hands away, putting them behind her back. It's not what she wanted to do, but it's what she did.

You felt bad so you copied her movement.

Things were painfully silent. People walking by would feel the awkwardness, even if it was for a few seconds. So MJ decided to break it.

"So Y/n, are you going to that frat party tonight?"

"Of course."

"Cool. I was thinking about going."

"Huh?!" You all shouted in unison. It was common knowledge that MJ did not like interact with school functions, especially frat parties. So you were all utterly confused.

"Don't act so surprised. Classes are almost over. I want to be able to say that I went to a college party. And we're all going." MJ just decided for the group.

It's not that Kate's never been to a party before, her mom threw parties all the time. She's just never been to a party with you before. She was about to see a whole new version of you.

Her heartbeat was through the roof.

College parties were a different breed.

Kate's moms parties had adults in formal attire, champagne, and some light dancing here and there. This party was blasting some weird music that Kate couldn't decipher and everyone was chugging beers like there was no tomorrow.

This was normal for a college.

But not normal for Kate.

She followed MJ toward the kitchen, attaching to her like a child at the doctor's office. She was the only person she knew at the party besides you and she didn't want to lose her before she could find you.

That would be heinous.

The kitchen was already messy, drinks covering the floors and the cabinets. Some of them were full but most were empty.

MJ seemed to be in her element almost, opening the fridge and grabbing some food like she lived here. She didn't even care and neither did the frat guys who saw her do it.

"Yo Tyler, where's the peanut butter?" She shouted over the music to a guy sitting on a couch in the other room.

"Wherever you left it last time, MJ!"

"You guys are dirty! I hope you know that!"

He nodded, just accepting the statement. But it only caused Kate to be even more confused as she watched her friend make her sandwich.

"You've been to one of these parties before?" She wondered, standing next to MJ as close as she possibly could. "No. But sometimes I put food in their fridge because they don't eat."

Kate scanned the room, hoping to see you somewhere. She thought it was going to be like a movie, all the dancing kids would part, you two would join up in the middle, and kiss.

But it was nothing like that. It wasn't even close.

You entered shortly after her, and you were immediately welcomed, everyone shouting your name and coming up to give your hugs.

You obviously have been to a lot of these parties.

You pushed through the people, going right to your sister. "Making your sandwich I see." You mentioned, tapping her on the shoulder to let her know you were there. Even though, she most definitely heard everyone screaming your name.

Once again, you were in slow motion as Kate stared at you. She watched as you turned toward her and smiled when you saw her. You grabbed her hands and pulled in for a hug.

She thought this was a dream.

She heard some muffled speak coming from your mouth and now she knew she was tripping.

"Huh?" She shouted, hoping you would repeat yourself. "I said you probably shouldn't drink with your head injury. It might not be safe." Her heart swelled, she loved that you cared so much about her.

"But it's a party. What am I supposed to do if not drink?" She joked, leaning against the counter. "It'll be okay. I'll hang out with you all night."

She thought you were joking which kind of made her sad but you weren't. You stayed next to her all night, talking about everything under the sun.

You both realized that the music was hurting your ears so you found a quiet room and sat on the floor in front of the door.

So no one would just walk in.

You found out everything about each other.

She found out you were a few minutes older than MJ, you loved video games, and that you were one of the few people who actually enjoyed your classes.

"What are you, a nerd or something?" She joked but you just smiled, answering her question. Her eyes went wide as she playfully shoved you. "No way!"

Things were weirdly silent between you as you just sat there, staring at each other. She wondered what was happening and why the talking stopped.

But then she noticed what was happening.

She followed your eye line and surely enough, you were looking at her mouth. Before she could say anything about the awkward silence, you put your hand on her cheek and pulled her into you for a deep kiss.

She wasn't expecting it but she surely welcomed it. She always dreamed of kissing you and now it was happening. She didn't know what to do with her hands, oh no. She was freaking out about her hands when she was literally having her dream kiss.

Wow.

As the two of you were moving closer and the kiss was getting a little more heated, someone tried the door, twisting the knob with no avail.

That made the two of you jump apart, like you were in trouble.

But as quickly as they came, they were gone. And now things were again awkwardly silent. You had just basically made out with Kate and you usually didn't know what to do after this.

So you decided to leave.

"This has been fun but I have to get home. Maybe we could do it again." You winked before exiting through the door, leaving Kate there to think of what just happened.

She thought her head injury was working overtime and she was just imagining everything that just happened. She was still in her bed at home and none of this was happening.

She was being crazy.

She wasn't being crazy.

She woke up the next day and everything that was yesterday was waining on her now. Her eyes were adjusting from being under all that dark light in the frat house. Her makeup was messed up from not taking it off before she went to sleep.

Everything yesterday happened.

She made out with you yesterday.

Yikes.

She got dressed for class and went to find Peter once again. He was talking to Gwen and he wasn't being a humongous dweeb. But she disregarded it. "Dude!" She screamed as she ran up to him, out of breath.

"What?!" He shouted, already sprung into action.

"I made out with Y/n last night!"

"What?!" Everyone in the general area looked right at him, causing both Gwen and Kate to put their hands on his mouth.

"Jeez you are loud." Gwen mentioned, dropping her hands from his face. "Loud for you." He tried, it didn't work at all. Gwen and Kate just scrunched their faces in disgust.

"Don't ever say that again." Kate told him, Gwen nodding along with her, solidifying her point.

He shook his head too, agreeing.

It went silent once more as Peter and Gwen pointed behind Kate, making her look. You were walking toward her and she wasn't ready to talk with you. Not yet.

So you did what any sane person would do.

She ran in the complete opposite direction. She ended up bumping into someone, leaving them down on the floor. "Sorry, Ted!"

"Ted!" Peter shouted, being all dramatic about him falling.

'Since when are him and Ted friends,' Kate thought to herself but she didn't feel like stopping her run to ask so she moved on. Peter was weird, Ted was weird, it was a match made in heaven.

She continued running all day.

Until she couldn't.

She was packing up and the professor had left. She was in the back of the class, putting everything away when you popped up in the doorway. She wanted to book it but you were in the only exit and she wasn't going to leave her expensive backpack here.

She was stuck.

"Hello." You greeted all ominously. "Hi Y/n. It's lovely to see you." She tried but you weren't budging on your angry expression. Understandable.

"Was it lovely to see me when you ran from me?"

She walked right into that one.

"I'm sorry." She finished packing her stuff and ran right up to you almost immediately. "What happened? I thought we had fun last night."

Kate didn't realize while she was running that she was sending the absolute wrong message. She liked you but was just too scared to tell you. Yet she was a superhero? It doesn't really make any sense.

"I'm sorry. I don't know how to talk to you. So I ran."

You sat down on the teacher's desk, just awaiting for her to explain herself. So she sat next to you and started talking.

"I like you, okay. I was scared to talk to you all school year but I didn't. So when you hit me with your locker, I figured, perfect time to speak. But then I didn't. Then we started texting, perfect time to tell you. Then I didn't. Then you kissed me and I finally going to say something. Then I got scared and ran. And now we're here."

You sat silent for a few minutes, processing what she said. It look like you were putting the pieces together.

"Why didn't you say something? I was flirting with you because I thought you liked me." Her eyes shot open and her face crunched. That's kind of mean. And teasing. You noticed the look on her face so you explained yourself.

"I like you too. MJ told me you liked me back because she knew I had a crush on you and it was driving me crazy." You gave her one more shove and she suddenly put all the pieces in place.

"Wait a minute. MJ was the one who gave you my number." She mentioned, everything in her brain going into the right spot. "And she's the one who made you go to the party." You added, understanding where her mind was going.

"MJ was playing matchmaker this whole time." Kate giggled, Peter wasn't lying. She did love love. "But something doesn't make sense." She wondered, putting her finger in the sky.

"What?"

"How did she make it so you hit me with your locker?"

"She told me she wanted to borrow my lip gloss, I should have knew something was off when she asked but I just wanted to help. She knew you weren't in class, so she figured we would bump into each other."

"She didn't account for the nose bleed, did she?"

"Maybe she did."

Out of nowhere, you both bursted into giggles.

[definatelymrhyde]

Definatelymrhyde’s guide to Worse Than I Had Thought and it’s giant TGSxOther Jekyll and Hyde universe crossovers

Okay so WTIHT is gonna start getting real confusing as of now. So for the convenience of the however many people read it, my editor @jekyll-everything and even myself I’m making a short little guide to explain it!! It’s even completed with Drawings!!

There’s a short summary of the basic plot without spoilers, then how to differentiate the different characters from all the different universes!!

Short story summary for simplicity reasons

Worse than I had thought is based on this idea: TGS Jekyll gets caught up in some experiment that used lots of chemicals and lightning, something happens and he ends up in another dimension where one; It’s in the perpetual state of being a musical, and two; There’s another Jekyll and Hyde there! And a Murderer! Wow! It seems really simple until you get into later in the story…

It was initially meant to be a crack fic but then I started taking it seriously. So now it’s like.. a real actual story.. it’s still partially a comedy with lots of jokes, though!!

SPOILER ALERT FOR CHAPTERS 14/15 FROM THIS POINT ON I GUESS.

THE CHARACTERS!!

This is all the Jekyll and Hyde’s you will meet. First and foremost, the main men themselves, TGS Jekyll and Hyde! We call them Henry and Hyde in the fic. Alternatively, we also call them ‘Society Jekyll/Hyde, and Henry had an Alias ‘Henry Wallace.’ Hyde doesn’t have an alias because plot points and I forgot to give him one.

Second, WTIHT Jekyll and Edward! Their universe is where everyone gets stuck. This Jekyll JUST created Hyde and probably hates himself for it. We call these two Jekyll and Edward . Or Musical Jekyll and Edward. They’re not the ones from the musical though. Theyre universe is a mish mash of a bunch of different Jekyll and Hyde univserses! They’re kind of like my own adaptation of the story in a way!

And last but not least, OG Book Jekyll and Hyde!! We call him Dr. Jekyll, The Doctor or Mr. Hyde. This Jekyll and Hyde story is the OG where Hyde is like a spooky alchemical induced Flesh costume and just the same conciousness. However, Jekyll refuses to admit that they’re literally the same conciousness out of pure being a terrible person.

Then there’s some other dudes.

Like the board of govonors who are really non-important.

BUT

This universe has its own Utterson! And it’s Own Lanyon!! Surprise!!

Utterson is essentially the TGS Lanyon of the WTIHT Universe, being WTIHT Jekylls BFF.

WTIHT Lanyon and WTIHT Jekyll however…

We’re gonna say that they’re not on talking terms…

Lucy and Emma/Lisa from the musical are also mentioned!! I’m not sure yet if we will ever see them but they DO make a really cute couple, at least their WTIHT versions do..

Sir Danvers Carew MIGGGT be mentioned later on. Still unsure of that. But like. Oh well. He’s pretty cool. He’s Emma/Lisas father and is very eccentric but just.. understands nothing of what’s happening. He is blissfully unaware but he’s a real good guy I promise.

Anyways, There is also tons of world building for the WTIHT universe that I’m not going to get into right now because I’m gonna be real with you here, it’s long. So that’s all for now!!!

If this made everything somehow more confusing I am SO sorry!! If I was unclear on something please don’t hesitate to ask I don’t bite I promise (Edward might, though.)

[crownedinmarigolds]

Welcome to my art/hobby/fandom/etc blog! My name is Kelsey, CrownedinMarigolds on Tumblr, and I've been on this website since 2012? Yep I'm an ancient being. If you're interested in supporting me or giving me a little tip for doin' what I do, here is my KO-FI! Zero pressure of course. My Bluesky if you're interested! My Art Instagram if you're interested!

My favorite subjects to draw are primarily OC based, and the sandbox I play in is usually Vampire the Masquerade/World of Darkness! But of course I love all manner of TTRPG. While I have things I like consistently, I will reblog and talk about all kinds of different things that may be out of left field! This is my mish-mash blog, just be warned! I'd also like to shout out my true love, my muse, my baby-daddy: @thesixthplaneteer. He's a very talented writer and a lot of my work and his work are intrinsically tied together! Most of my OCs are drawn with his and his work provides some context for all the fun things I draw for us!

My art commissions are: closed for the holidays!

My quick-sketch commissions are open!

If you're interested in commissioning me, please see my commission information here! Here are examples of my work//my art tag in case you'd like to get a feel of my art style before making a decision. I love a messy and painterly style so please understand that before reaching out! I am open to art trades!

Here is how I usually schedule my time when I'm working on commissions, in case you were interested! (Tag guide, Chronicle Info, OC Directory beneath the cut!)

Tag Guide (If you want to block or what have ya!) :

I self reblog often, so it is under the self reblog! tag.

I often reblog others' commission post under commission boost

I post personal little dribbles about my life under personal

~

Information on my various Vampire the Masquerade stories/Chronicles:

The Poisoned Peach: ATL by Night - my actual VTM game I'm playing with my husband. It follows Khloe Osborne, a fresh Thinblood trying to navigate the vampire world without really knowing anything. She has a coterie and the Camarilla currently runs Atlanta, Georgia... but for how long?

Wilted Roses - The overarching full canon to the plot of our World of Darkness. This is a mixed bag of information and stories that aren't necessarily in a Chronicle but flavor the world! Nyth and Noa are probably the stars of this overall story.

~

My OCs:

Noa Hidalgo-Giovanni - my main OC, my Giovanni/Hecata necromancer! I will probably draw her across multiple AUs/fandoms so don't be surprised to see her.

Khloe Osborne - my current VTM/V5 PC in my husband's chronicle, The Poisoned Peach, ATL by Night! She is a Ventrue Thinblood, in a coterie with three other Thinbloods as they try to stop the Atlanta Camarilla from enslaving the local Thinblood populace! I also like to put her in Baldur's Gate 3 art too.

Parvati - another favorite character of mine. She was originally my first real Pathfinder PC that I played for a long time. I also started writing a book about her titled Crowned in Marigolds, sort of based on the Pathfinder world she had been placed in. She is now my Vampire the Masquerade Ravnos Elder who is in the Ministry/Followers of Set!

thesixthplaneteer's OCs (the OCs I treat like mine but are actually not!)

Dr. Nythanel Loken PhD- Elder Thinblood, the Thriceborn! The big favorite and Noa's other half. Cute and full of the audacity!

Ralph - The perfect man - a Thinblood that got cursed with the Nosferatu bane (lite). He's Khloe's boyfriend in my current Chronicle. Former Spec Ops but Embraced out of spite because he was hot. (Did NOT go well for the sire!)

Stakebait Coterie - The group Ralph and Khloe are a part of which also includes Christian and Kyle! The four best friends that anyone could have!!

[fictionadventurer]

I happened to see a good chunk of the Netflix Persuasion. I can't give a complete review or analysis or whatever, but I have thoughts.

This movie has some very pretty colors. I like cool color palettes, what can I say?

There was one shot of a purple sunset where I was like, "Oh, I could live in this picture."

The aesthetic was so trendy I couldn't take it seriously. The clothes were that 2019 Little Women cottagecore vibe with lots of poorly-fitted textures and layers and colors. I laughed out loud at the Big White Text announcing LYME or BATH, because it's such a specific vibe.

I tried to detach from any notion of it as an Austen adaptation, and just enjoy it as its own movie that just happens to take place in a history-flavored fantasy world where everyone uses modern speech. Because sometimes those stories can be fun. It still didn't work.

Because it mostly just confused me. It was this weird mish-mash of genres and tones that didn't really blend together. Oil and water. It was Pinterest and Hallmark and Austen and College Humor and Instagram and Feminism and it's all felt like it came from completely different movies.

It was trying to be a sincere period drama love story and a goofy parody at the same time and it just didn't work.

Like, there were some sweet moments in it. Anne talking about poetry to Captain Benwick was rather nice.

But then you've got things like the weird octopus-sucking-my-face story Anne tells at Lady Dalrymple's. Even that could have worked okay in context, because Mr. Eliot jumps in and turns it into a metaphor about identity, which helps to cover for Anne's awkwardness and shows that he's willing to help her out. But then they keep bringing up the octopus as a sort of pet name and it's just so weird and doesn't fit with the rest of the story.

I've gotten ahead of myself so I'm going to backtrack to some specifics.

Mary Musgrove was excellent. Spot-on. I love how she's visibly younger than Anne. First adaptation I've seen that emphasizes that.

It was interesting how they emphasized the Mrs. Clay storyline. It actually sparked some interesting thoughts about the differences between the male social climbing of the sailors (shown in a positive light in Austen) and the female social climbing of the marriage-seeking ladies (shown in a more negative light).

I've never had a clearer picture of why Mrs. Clay matters so much to Mr. Elliot. Even in the book, it's a bit muddy, but it's crystal clear here. Mr. Elliot telling us his schemes straight-out did have the benefit of making the story very easy to follow.

I've got to back up again.

They completely altered the Anne/Wentworth storyline by mixing around all the plot points.

After they go to Bath, Wentworth seeks out Anne, says that they haven't had a chance to talk, and tells her how he always admired how good she was in an emergency. And this was before the staircase scene. I was extremely confused, until it hit me--this is a dream sequence! This is how Anne wants it to play out, but then she'll wake up!

But no! This actually happened! Wentworth says all this very sincerely and passionately, leading up to him declaring...that he wants to be friends. (At least there's context for "We're worse than exes--we're friends.")

It completely alters the trajectory of their relationship. Instead of jumping from the passion of hatred to the passion of love, Wentworth has gone to the other end of the pole--friendly indifference. He likes Anne and is totally okay with her marrying someone else.

I think they changed it so Mr. Elliot could be a serious contender in the love triangle. Wentworth has let her go--can she find happiness with someone else? I'll admit it's an interesting change, even if it's not Persuasion.

But it also seems like they're trying to make Wentworth a Suitable Love Interest for the Twitter Generation. Wentworth gets weirdly bristly with Mr. Elliot. Then Wentworth apologizes because Anne is a strong woman who doesn't need his protection. He tells her she should have been able to be an admiral. He's being mature and letting go of his resentment and wishing her well and showing that he doesn't like Regency Gender Roles. It's like they're shaving away his character growth in favor of a bland Nontoxic Relationship (TM).

But then Anne likes Mr. Elliot because he's bad? He openly talks about how he's trying to wreck her father's relationship to get the title. He insults her family. And she likes it.

This version of Anne holds her family in contempt. She doesn't like them or how they treat her and she openly disdains it. So she connects with Mr. Elliot. But the book Anne seems sad for her family--she doesn't like their behavior because she wishes they could be better people. She has compassion while movie Anne is resentful.

Persuasion is all about restraint. This movie is all about lack of restraint. People speak bluntly and say what they think and openly insult people. It's a completely different culture from the usual Austen movie, because it's modern culture. Which emphasizes how little we value good manners and restraint.

It's also weird how in changing the story, they also turn it into a generic rom-com. There's a more blatant love triangle between the good boy and the bad boy. Wentworth is starting to fall in love with Anne, but he's got an opportunity to advance his career, and he has to decide within a few days, oh no! It's textbook romcom plot points.

There was another point that I'll probably think of later.

EDIT: Oh, I just remembered! I think it was that the movie was so interested in the vibes and emotions of each individual scene that it didn't bother to try to stitch them together in a coherent whole.

The ending kiss looked 1000% like the cover of a cheap romance novel.

And the final moral of "don't let anyone tell you how to live your life" feels so simplistic and selfish and weird.

Overall, I'm not angry. I'm just confused. It's not the type of movie to arouse any kind of emotion other than "Huh???" And maybe a bit of regret that they couldn't have done better things with the interesting bits.

[sheydgarden]

Question: I am ethnically Jewish, though not culturally (complicated family history). I read your book on the roots of Antisemitic origins of Solomonic magic and wanted to ask:

If working with the Ars Goetia as entities themselves may be problematic: could reframing and restructuring the paradigms to re-imagine the listed demons and create new demons to work alongside be a better solution? I do enjoy the recent demonological work I’ve started but seeing some of the origins, it makes me wonder if my workings could be adjusted by basing my rituals in values I personally have and reframing it away from the work found in Solomonic Texts.

You had said in your Zine you yourself had worked to strip the Antisemitism from the Solomonic Imagery and parts of the practice and I was wondering if you had any advice on that process because I do find it fulfilling to ritually work alongside entities like this but am wondering how to do it in a better way?

hi! i'm gonna answer this one publicly so that i have something to refer folks to here when they ask me this same question (which i've gotten before), hope that's cool! also, apologies for the length of reply, but that's what happens when you open this particular box with me, haha.

i'm just gonna give it to you straight (and this is my opinion, of course, i know there are plenty who disagree with me! but you asked me) - i don't think there's anything you can do to "Solomonic" magic to render it not antisemitic. the antisemitism isn't a nasty veneer you can scrape off to get at some good stuff underneath - it's baked in. the entire premise of a book about a "powerful Jewish magician" who worked with Christian demons (who themselves are just a mish-mash of names & concepts from various cultures) is antisemitic. in the case of the Lesser Key specifically, we're talking about a book most likely written & distributed by Christian clergy (that's who had access to the education & tools required!) who were at the same time actively contributing to Jewish genocide. it's the foundation of the thing.

when i talk about my sigil artwork that uses grimoire-inspired imagery, i'm talking purely about holding onto an aesthetic, a visual language of lines. i can take out antisemitic visual signifiers easily because i'm only working with an image out of context. i don't think it's possible to remove antisemitism from the concept or the practice of Solomonic/ceremonial magic, at least not without completely altering it at its core - and then why bother basing anything on it at all? (i'm a Jew, not a western occultist, so i haven't tried)

i think really considering what exactly it is you've been getting out of this might make things clearer for you in terms of how you want to proceed. if it's the "Jewish" flavor, there's a whole world of actual Jewish folklore & mysticism, complete with demons of our own - you mention having Jewish ancestry, but not being culturally or religiously Jewish, so i would definitely recommend making a connection to Jewish community & learning a lot before you dive into any kind of Jewish spirituality. if it's just the concept of calling on entities via ritual work - why these? why not your own inventions? the demons listed in the Lesser Key were pretty much invented during the Renaissance, even if some of their names come from older sources. occultists combined, embellished & invented them to fit into a Christian theology, using a faux-Jewish origin story in order to lend them both more credibility (in a time when Jews were literally equated with demons!) and some spicy exoticism. i'm pretty baffled as to why so many folks still want to base a spiritual practice on that, beyond the fact that they're considered cool and/or sufficiently edgy if you grew up Christian.

if i'm being more blunt here than i was in the zine, it's because we're solely in "personal opinion" territory, and my honest opinion is that whatever folks find enjoyable about ceremonial magic could be better put to use in a framework that leaves Judaism alone entirely (and either honestly calls itself Christian - which it historically is - or creates a new cultural/religious system to operate under). i hope this was helpful - thanks for taking the time to read it!

[2af-afterdark]

Mild Noctilucent spoilers below as I want to discuss events up to chapter 6 as well as some character stories. Will not be articulate. Just want to praise something I like about the game.

I love how the cast looks like they will be one trope, but end up being a completely other. It makes them feel deeper in a way.

Using Heigl, Mishe, and Xiel as examples...

He is an older gentleman with a hunting rifle who likes to smoke cigars. He is a visual example of a dilf, grizzle bastard. Everyone I show him to assumes he is a headstrong hunter or the like. But this man is actually a journalist and photographer. He is still grieving over his dead wife. He is also very cautious to the point that he left the room before Anli's big secret could be revealed (not going to say what it is, but you'll learn in chapter 6) because the consequences of learning it were not worth his freedom. He is also a traitor. Or, double-agent I suppose is the better word. He joined the group with ulterior motives and is working with Hoshi to unknown ends. He looks like a standard dilf trope, but he has layers.

Mishe is a cutie pie. Someone told me he looks like the arrogant brat trope. That is to say, they assumed he'd be the know-it-all who loves books and acts haughty, but is still a bottom. SURPRISE! He's actually a cinnamon roll that relates to Anli the most due to both recently having lost their important guardian figures. He is a bookworm, but that's because he likes learning. He's also linked to Sen, but that's for chapter 7...

I have not met Xiel in story yet, but I have read his personal story. My assumption was that he would be full of himself, arrogant, scummy, and manipulative. Honestly? He's very charming. It may still be manipulation since that's his job, but he also very ethical. He purged his guild of the rotten members when he took over. He is rather to the point though. Man basically tells Anli to strip in the poison relief story and agrees to add pillow talk to their contract since Anli doesn't want to go straight to boning.

I just like how they have more going on beyond their base designs.

[jeanmoreaux]

Just finished to read If we were villains (thanks to you). I really loved it. Don't know if I'll ever be able to form coherent thoughts on it (maybe after exams seasons), but I wanted to thank you for the discovery. I really loved the ending, and the way the author of saying nothing and everything at the same time. We have to form our own conclusions, but they are evident and not that ambigous. The characters are amazing, I loved the dedication of Oliver, the fragility of James, the benevolence of Colburne ( and his intelligence) and Filippa. I loved the strong, unfailible bond between James and Oliver, it's one of my favorite dynamics betwee characters, we are our own thing. ( you also introduce me to aftg, and it has been in my brain ever since). Just some thoughts at past mignight, hope some of it make some sense <3

ohh i am so happy you liked iwwv!! ((and even happier to hear i had a hand in you giving it a chance. it’s always nice to know i could help someone find their way to a book they enjoyed.)) iwwv is truly one of my personal favs—the writing, the plot, and the characters all work so well for me. it borrows from shakespeare in most satisfying way and still tells an original story echoing the familiar. the vibes, too, are just immaculate. i think the decision to keep the ending open adds a lot to the entire experience and lets people draw their own conclusions. and i totally agree with what your saying about the characters!! and yes, the james and oliver dynamic is soooooooo compelling. they are so close yet so far from each other in a way…… very two sides of the same coin as well.

((and aaaah screaming about the aftg thing dfkfjjsg makes me very, very happy too. those books mean so much to me.)) thank you so much for the message, i love it!! you’re always welcome to leave random thoughts at midnight or any other time of day <3 i’d love to hear them.

[chubby-p4ws]

French neopronouns

I used chatgpt to make the board

I took some existing neopronouns and changed/added things

Here's how you can use some of them in a sentence:

Iel/lae/el(l)ui/maon/taon/saon:

(They/them)

Iel aime lire. (They likes to read.)

J'ai lu maon livre hier. (I read my book yesterday.)

Iel parle à taon/saon grand père. (They're talking to your/their grandpa)

C'est leur/saon jouet à ellui/elui/eux. (It's their toy)

(I didn't change iel/lea one,it's just an exemple)

Dox/lo/do/mox/tox/sox:

(Dox/Doxself)

Dox va au parc. (Dox going to the park.)

Mox idée était incroyable. (My idea was amazing.)

J'ai vu tox/lo chien à la fête. (I saw your/the dog at the party.)

C'est sox chien à do (it's dox's dog)

Dox est tout•e seul•e par do/eux-même (Dox is alone by Doxself/themself)

Meush/lus/shi/mish/tish/sish:

(Mush/Mushself)

Meush shi a cuisiné lus dîner par shi/eux-même. (Mush cooked mush's dinner by mushelf/themself)

C'est Lus gâteau. (This is the cake.)

Meush a vu mish/tish/sish oiseau hier. (Mush saw my/your/mush's bird yesterday.)

Faune/lun/nil/maun/taun/saun:

(Faun/Faunself)

Faune aime jouer à saun jeux vidéos favoris. (Faun likes playing fauns favorite video games.)

C'est lun cadeau de maun oncle. (This is my Uncle's gift.)

Faun l'a (lun +a) ramener de nil-même/d'eux-même (Faun brought it by faunself/themself)

Faune a vu taun poisson dans le jardin. (Faun saw faun's fish in the garden.)

Spore/lor/rol/mor(e)/tol/sol or sor(e):

(Spore/sporeself)

Spore a réservé une table pour lor rencard avec rol/eux-même (Spore reserved a table for the date with Sporeself/themself)

Mor•e Pote est très sympa. (My friend is very cool)

Spore t'as (tol + a) parlé de sol/sore allergie?

(Did Spore talked to you about Spores allergy?)

Others neopronouns

Xiel/xellui => xey/xem

Xil/xui => xe/xim

Ix/xil => x/xself

æ or æl/æm

Zel/zell

Xi/Xèm => Xe/xem

[windvexer]

heyyy heyyy Chicken, hope ya doin all good out there in the woods and in the worlds, vertically and laterally! so! another anonymous question time.

suppose one finds that they cant clair-this-or-that, they dont gets them visions or signs or shivers. like they be deaf or blind or incapable of any imaginations. like what they say? no internal dialogue something. inner twilight and darkness.

cant go to magical otolaryngologist or oculist (almost written occultist haha) because there is none.

what to do to unlock? how to?

Hi! I'm not sure if I understand you. It seems to me like you're discussing a wide range of things which I don't always believe are correlated to one another.

Aphantasia isn't, as far as I'm aware, the same thing as having no internal dialogue. Psychism isn't the same as receiving signs, and while may be related to intuition, isn't the same thing; people can have visions without having psychism or intuitive experiences.

You are incorrect to say that there are no magical otolarynologists or oculists. Practitioners who are able to diagnose and heal spiritual maladies do exist, and good ones aren't so hard to find as we may imagine.

However, just because someone doesn't receive visions/signs/psychic input/intuition, doesn't mean that anything is actually wrong.

An example is someone who doesn't exercise and can't lift a 100lb weight going to a doctor to be diagnosed for their lack of ability. There is no medical issue. There is no reason to suspect a medical issue.

The problem with a lot of common exercises, spells, etc., is that they are predicated on the idea that everyone is able to experience thoughts visually and linguistically.

I'm generally set on the idea that however a person normally experiences their own thoughts and processes the world around them is also how they should go about connecting with magic and psychism and so forth.

Being a visual thinker doesn't give people the ability to be psychic, you know?

A while ago I got frustrated with the ubiquitous use of "visualization" as a term in spells and exercises and replaced it with what I called OBFUK (observe, believe, feel, understand, or know). To me, this helped me understand the purpose of "visualization," because the way it's commonly used, I really don't think it's that much about imagining pictures.

In general, I believe that when most people talk about visualization, they're talking about some mish-mash of aligning intent towards purpose and then focusing on that real hard.

I'm re-reading Weaving Fate by Aidan Wachter and one thing I like about this book is that he focuses on the idea that during the mindspace exercise, you really don't have to see or feel anything. It's suffice to tell yourself, "I'm walking down the stairs. I enter into a corridor. I walk until I find a special door."

How would a person experience psychism and spiritual knowledge if they don't have inner dialogue or visual thoughts? Well, quite the same way they already experience their thoughts, I imagine.

Since you've brought up a ton of various things in your ask, I'm not sure if there's any way for me to say "here's how to unlock." Not that there's any one-size-fits-all program anyway. Sorry if I've understood your meaning.

[xyazats-tf-or-pass]

an npc in a video game! That would be cool

Tf or Pass: Video Game NPC

*You're on a road in a suburb, said road splits into three separate paths:

*To the left, there is a shady forest in the distance, with a weathered sign at its entrance. You cannot make out what the sign says at this distance, but you could have sworn you saw something move.

*To the right, the road leads into a street full of houses; The street is packed with cars, and as you gaze further down the street, there seems to be some form of celebration going on.

*And straight in front of you is a library. Or is it a bookstore? On third glance, there might also be some videogames included...?

Go near the forest

Head towards the celebration

>Approach the library...bookstore...thing

*You walk towards the...library? The building seems to be an amalgamation of several different structures, each tangentially related to books or information. You're getting a bit of a headache trying to comprehend this architecture.

>Enter...whatever this is

Get away from that thing

*You enter the building, the interior you can see is a mish-mash of library, computer lab, and coffee shop. The inhabitants of this environment do not seem bothered by the strange geometry; Speaking of inhabitants, there are several that catch your eye:

*Towards a coffee shop area, a barista is preparing drinks. That's not the weird thing; The weird thing is that you can't really see the person, as your vision gets blurry when you glance at them.

*Seated at a computer is...uh, some black and grey colored, vaguely draconic blob thing. You can't see what its doing from this angle, but it seems focused on whatever is onscreen. Maybe you shouldn't bother it?

*And in a library section, you see a figure darting around erratically, the accompanying bangs and crashes indicating distress, or maybe its just having fun? Either way, no one is paying attention to it.

Talk to the blurry barista

Investigate the figure darting around

>Go bother the blob

Get out of there

*Against your better judgement, you move towards the weird gelatinous dragon, it turning towards you when you tap on the desk it's occupying.

*You realize now that the thing is encased in a membrane, making it more like a cell or ameba than a slime blob. You also realize it's wearing no clothes, save for some pouches strapped around its body and limbless glasses perched on it's snout, the blue color being complemented by the various orange specks that you can now see in the creature's body.

*As the creature regards you with its white, pupil-less eyes, its expression tells you that it doesn't what to be bothered right now, especially by a stranger.

[Tf Enthusiast] You take a glance at the screen, and notice that it's currently showing a blog centered around transformation. How neat!

Weird Creature: "Oh, um, hi, can I help you?"

*The entity's voice is weird, in that it has the audio quality of an 1930s-40s voice recording.

What are you?

What is this place?

>[Tf Enthusiast] Oh, are you into tf? Me too!

Stop bothering the creature

*Its expression softens at your comment.

Weird Creature: "Oh cool! Don't run in-into a l-l-l" The creature closes its eyes-more like sucking its eyes into its body-, apparently trying to force the thought out.

Weird Creature: "a lot of those, or none that come out and say it. I'm actually working on my tf centric blog. Do you...want me to talk about it?"

>Yes please

No thanks

*The creature's form ripples, shifting from draconic to a bat-like form. The glasses changes color, indicating that they're part of the being's body, to a yellow hue, complementing the purple accents the body now has.

Weird Creature: "Ok, so this is a blog where I rate whether or not I would transform into something or not. People can submit creatures for my consideration. This one asked if I would tf into a video game npc; And this one interests me; First, this would be a modifier to an existing creature. Second, there are so many variables at play here; What genre is it? What's my role in said game? If the game was reset, would I be aware of it? What happens when the game is shut off?"

*The entity gets passionate as it talks, its body shifting as it does so.

Weird Creature: "Honestly, I'm saying yes based off of concept alone."

*Pauses game

*Saves game

*Quits game

Verdict: Transform

[multi-fandom-lunatic]

I absolutely think the people on booktok used to be lovers of wattpad/ao3 tropey fanfiction. A lot of the stuff that is pushed out now feels like fanfiction of an existing franchise, rather than a book/series that stands on its own. People will make videos talking about how they find uber masculine and patriarchal cis men with shadow powers hot. And because this is what the people on booktok want, I find authors are writing for the readers rather than themselves - which is never good as someone who writes. Most people do write for themselves, and books that are made to be marketable by including (usually) white male characters with shadow powers and white female protagonists who don't actually have agency sell well, yes, but they usually have tons of problems and are analysed to the moon and back by critics because of the prevalence of these tropes within original fiction, specifically romantasy, which in my opinion does read like fanfiction of already existing media. I mean, you might find the Darkling, the abusive and misogynistic villain, from shadow and bone hot but that doesn't mean we want white people to make their own similar characters to glorify and romanticise toxic behaviours that men like him show in fiction and in real life.

I'm definately not the person to be saying "back in the good old days..." but I guess I really am that person now, wishing for when fanfiction was fanfiction and literature was literature.

I do think that the commercialisation of fanfiction is the root of all the problems I've complained about in previous responses. The white feminism (fandom being hugely white, cis women), the prevelance of uber masc cis men (the bad boy trope) and and more. Companies like Wattpad churning out the worst literature you've ever read and it achieving huge fame like being adapted into TV shows is encouraging emerging authors to write like that. Use those characters. Those tropes. Market it that way.

And absolutely, authors are writing for the readers rather than themselves. Unfortunately, the loudest voices of today are the freshly adult white cis women, who haven't quite finished with their fanfiction phase.

Booktok, consumerism and commercialisation of books breed anti intellectualism, so books become no longer an art that says something about the author's morals and political views, but rather the a quick buck. And the anti intellectualism is prevalent not only in the reading material itself but also how Booktok markets/thirsts over books. One reason there are so many videos that are "Spicy enemies to lovers book recs🔥🔥🔥" and "Billionaire romance books for 2025" is because that's all the are. The characters are uncompelling and the most inside-the-box thing you've ever thing you've ever read, but they satisfy the very specific thing that the reader (all of Booktok) wants to read. Authors now think that a mish mash of different tropes and cookie cutter characters is acceptable writing, because now more than ever, since writing is driven by profit, they need to appeal to the tropes and consumerist nature of Booktok. Gone are the days of analysing a good book to death and finding metaphors and analogies that never would've been caught upon a first time read.

And authors don't really care about the writing of their book anymore, really. They just care if it goes "Booktok viral" and as long as it does that, they don't really care what critics say. People now buy a book based on how much Booktok says they should, not by reviews, I suppose.

Romance, Fantasy and any version of the two genres suffer most anon, I agree. Probably because these are two very common genres for fanfiction to be in. There's so many (toxic) preexisting tropes that fall under these two tropes that Booktok wants to put into literature. So many versions of "Bad boy/billionaire/mafia/werewolf/vampire" tropes that authors seem to close their eyes and grab at a few and write a book like that (and then have the audacity to market it like "If Harry Potter was like Beauty and Beast but darker and spicy and it's also a Hades and Persephone feminist retelling").

I hate to demonise authors in the way I'm doing right now, but a lot of them really are adding fuel to the fire that is the shitshow of Booktok. I'm no published author, but I do write quite a bit (dare I say, it's my whole life), and I actively avoid doing what Booktok does. So, critiquing writers is really me critiquing the shitty position they were put into (writing shitty, problematic books).

If what's on Booktok is any indication of what the effect of this toxic, misogynistic, racist turn of literature is, then I fear for the nostalgia baited adults and sucked in teens of Booktok.

Again, thanks for the ask! I'm back to feeling a little less in the dumps right now, so feel free to send more. I'll answer them ASAP.